Consent Laid Bare: Sex, Entitlement & the Distortion of Desire

You are a fourteen-year-old girl at a party. You are drunk. All your girlfriends are drunk. A boy is pressuring you to have sex. You don't really want to, but you don't know how to say no. You really want him to like him. You really want to be cool. So you say yes, at least you think you say yes. You can't remember. What you do remember is the shame that follows.

This depressing scenario plays out across Australia, every weekend. We know, because in 2021, 23-year-old Chanel Contos invited girls and women to provide testimonials of their most negative sexual experiences. The 6000 responses described behaviour that is, at best, chronically anti-social and, at worst, constitutes rape. Virtually none of these instances has been reported, let alone prosecuted. As a result of Chanel's advocacy, single-sex schools are going co-ed, the law has changed in NSW, schools have amped up their sex ed and parliaments have pondered the societal conditions that produce these circumstances.

Knowledge is power. The C-Word is a conversation starter that will help young women feel less alone, less likely to feel pressured into sexual encounters that they don't want, less ashamed if they find themselves in a tricky situation, and more inclined to hold their perpetrators to account in the moment and afterwards. It will help young men understand that there is a point where pressuring behaviour becomes criminal. It is the non-fiction Puberty Blues for Gen Z, and a tougher, grittier Florence Given. It is the book we wish wasn't necessary, but that we know is absolutely crucial reading for our daughters and sons.